Things aren't particularly peachy for me at the moment. Firstly my current module, Brain and Behaviour, is hard, like really insanely hard. As well as the concepts themselves being difficult to get my head around, there's just so so much to remember. The exam is next Friday and I can't see any chance in me being prepared for it. Secondly, my grandad passed away last Wednesday so I missed uni Weds - Fri to go home, plus I'm missing uni again tomorrow for the funeral. Which means lots of missed lectures plus lots of missed time in which I'd normally be studying equalling a very behind and stressed Faye. I've submitted an extenuating circumstances form and spoken to the GEP coordinator though and she's told me just to do my best under the circumstances so at least that's something.
After B&B's out of the way we dive straight into the next module, Consolidation of Systems, the exam for which is two days after my birthday so that's going to be a quiet one! Then after Easter break (only 2 weeks rather than the usual 4!) we've got 5 weeks of Human Development, then 2 weeks of study leave and then EEK end of year exams!! And then year 1 (and 2 technically) will be over and, providing I pass, I'll be a third year medic!! We're having to put down our preferences for where we want to be next year at the moment...and although they apparently pay no attention to anyone's preferences, it's still seeming an impossible decision right now to know which to put down. I don't think I particularly want to do an out-firm (i.e. living out in Essex for 9 weeks) - I know I'd get really lonely plus I'm looking forward to living in a house again (although that's a whole extra worry for me at the moment as I have no one to live with at the moment but I'm gonna stick my head in the sand with that one and hope it sorts itself out!). But then saying that, teaching on out-firms is meant to be better as there are less students per consultants - there can be up to 15 students per consultant on some of the in-firms apparently so it's a fight to do and see anything. Maybe I just won't fill in the form at all and leave it up to karma...but then I can't moan if I don't like what I get!!
I suppose I should try and sleep soon (although have left my sleeping tablets at uni and I'm incapable of getting to sleep without them, bad times! Note to self - after saying it for months I really must find time to visit my GP soon!) as it's a big day tomorrow. I went to my first funeral just before Christmas (my mum's best friend's who died of non-Hodgkin's lymphoma little more than 6 months after being diagnosed...it's a cruel, cruel world) and it was horrible. I mean it was a nice service and everything but it was just so sad. I know tomorrow is going to be just as bad. And unless everyone's prayers are anwered it might not be massively long before I'm at another one as my aunt's having a major battle with her cancer at the moment. But I refuse to think about anything happening to her as I won't be able to deal with that.
Anyway this has turned into a bit of an outpouring of everything in my head at the moment...this is what happens when I leave my diary at uni! Good job I don't have the greatest of followings...
Faye
xxx